Sunday 5 October 2014

Bookish Musings - The Problems With Loving Books

Bookish Musings is a feature here at Beautiful Bookish Butterflies that allows one of us to share our thoughts and opinions, talk and discuss things happening in the book and blogging community or share a personal book related issue we have. Today, Amanda is talking about loving books and just how it's such a strain on life, on money and just everything. It's like a full-time job, you just need to commit, and that's an issue sometimes. But how is it an issue? Find out..


I loooooove books. We all do, that's why we started book blogs, so we could share our love for books, find out about new and upcoming books and force blackmail encourage other people to read those books, but there are negatives to this wonderful love and hobby and that's what we're talking about today.

I think from a very young age I enjoyed books. I had quite a collection of childrens series, Animals in the Ark, Horrible Histories, that kind of thing, gore and cute kitties, that was me - I even owned a complete encyclopedia collection, which I still own to this day and it looks absolutely gorgeous still, Hardcover, blues, *melts into puddle*, so it's fair to say, books we're a part of me when I was younger. Not having friends who shared this love was fine by me at that time in my life, they liked games, I liked books, they liked going out, I liked staying in. Scratch that, I actually didn't have very many friends full stop, I think I had maybe one that I shared and even she didn't like reading, so I was a loner essentially. Fast forward to the now and I'm still the same. I may have gone off reading for a little while, but I have a collection of books again, I read an awful lot and have no friends that I see who I can share this love with. I have grown up to be a book lover with no book loving friends. The problem? I can't fangirl with these people, I can't talk about a book and how fantastic it was without feeling like I'm boring people, I can't share my love for something so wonderful with these people because they just don't understand. 'It's just a book', 'you can wait for the sequel, don't be a drama queen', 'why would people be assed about your thoughts, if it's a best seller, that's all that matters' and on and on it goes. These are the phrases I battle with everyday. They are good friends, great, fantastic, they support and love me no matter what, but understand and share my love, no.


I also live at home with Mum. I'm unemployed, searching for a job and we have to budget every moment of our lives, making sure we have enough money each week for us to go the job centre, so buying books isn't really on the radar anymore. So what happens when I fall in love with that upcoming release and don't get an ARC, then have to wait for the release date and still can't get it? I cry, that's what. Well, maybe not cry, but I am sure as hell pretty sad about it. Everyone's got that shiny new Hardcover, 'it looks so pretty' and 'feels so good', 'it's got a shiny cover' and 'smells like god' - yeah yeah, I hear you, STOP RUBBING THAT BOOK IN MY FACE ON INSTAGRAM PEOPLE. I am a jealous reader, I want what other people have. I want the books. All of the books. Many, many books. Cut down those trees, make them into books and bring me them on a platter, I want I want I want. Man, I sound like a spoilt brat, but those are the thoughts that run through my head, on the outside, I'm pretty calm and collected about not having that book. I'll get it, one day..


Eh, Christmas is coming up, how planned out are you? Are you wondering what to buy me, oh you shouldn't really, honestly, you mustn't- BOOKS! Why is this so difficult to understand, why must family and friends genuinely feel the need to ask me 'what would you like?' when the answer stares them in the face? I like books. I read books. I like to own books. I talk about books. I review books. I have discussions about books. Books, Books, BOOKS. Come on, really, are you that stupid? Okay, so, good example, the best friend this time last year asked me 'what do you want for Christmas?' Like, she genuinely came out and asked me that, on my bed, in my room, surrounded by books. I said 'why not get me a book?' What did she do? 'Oh yeah, never thought of that..' I'm sorry, WHAT?! How can you not think to buy the thing I love most in life? Don't get me that mug and coaster set, I already own around 5. Don't buy me socks unless they're snazzy with special grips on the bottom. Buy me a book, or a book voucher, or token, or take me book shopping, it's easy as that. Yet nobody thinks of these things..


Yet, even when I do have money for new books, or when people do actually gift me them, I find myself with another problem, where the hell do I put them? Excuse me bedroom, could you possibly, I don't know, grow a little, get a little wider so I can put more bookshelves in you please? Actually, forget that, I can't afford bookshelves, I'll just have to stack the new books, but they'll get damaged if I just leave them out in stacks on my floor, what about the cold, what about the insects that might crawl in them, what about- MY POOR BOOKS. That's right, I am in a constant state of 'ohmygod need to sort more room on my shelves' because I don't have room for books. I need to move books from one place to another, I now stack them on the shelves rather than like you'd see in places like Waterstones and WHSmith and my room won't grow, how rude. I currently have to have library books in stacks on the floor because I have no room, but their library books, that's okay, they've already been mutilated by other people, my cold floor isn't going to kill them, but my books, no, I need room for them, they need shelf space, and I don't have it. *panics* *cries*


Have you ever kind of , cancelled your plans with somebody to read? If not, you are a well made human being, but me? No, I cancelled on my best friend once to read Dying of the Light. It was the finale book in the Skulduggery series, I was already a day late in receiving it, I needed that book. She didn't understand, she doesn't like books, but me, I had no choice, it was either see her and delay another day or cancel and read the book in one night. I was a bad human being and I'll forever be judged by those actions but OH MY GOD it was worth it, all the worth, so much worth. Loving books means that I slowly end up losing my social life, not that I'm that social anyway, but for books like that, it's worth it, but what about when more of those books along and start finishing, can I just start ditch people in favour of reading. Look, if my friends understood my love for books, they'd forgive me, so it all comes full circle back to how they should just read and share my love, right?


I don't actually know what the point of this post was exactly. Maybe I was just letting off steam, maybe I was just ranting because of the place I'm in right now, but seriously, these are all important issues, very important issues and people just don't understand. Nobody can understand the pain a book lover has when they're poor and can't buy books. Nobody can understand how difficult it is to want to talk about something that nobody else is interested in other than book lovers. We all suffer these problems, and if you don't, well lucky you.

Do you suffer any of these problems? Do you have friends who don't understand or not enough room for new books? Do you think I'm being a little, over dramatic, or do you 100% agree with me? Leave your thoughts down below.

26 comments:

  1. I didn't go to an early screening of Alexander and the HTNGVB Day last month b/c I was behind on my reading! :)

    Also...try to get a seasonal job at a bookstore! If they want people beyond the holidays, they'll keep you on...or call you back! And they have loan programs to BORROW the pretty hardcovers! AND you are likelier to be approved for e-ARCs (and sometimes physical ones) if you're a bookseller. AND publishers blindsend stuff to your store! And if you're REALLY lucky, you will have co-workers to fangirl with!

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    1. I'm trying to volunteer at books stores at the moment instead of charity shops as it would be so much more enjoyable I think! Thank you for the advice Bonnie! It's good to know that I'm not alone too! :D

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  2. I ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR PAIN. Oh, so so much. I'm in the exact same position for a lot of it. I can't afford to buy books and I don't usually get the coveted ARCs. So if my library doesn't get it -- I don't read it. (Although they have a "request purchase" option, and sometimes my library buys the books I ask for! Which is AWESOME. But obviously months after they've been released.) Ahhh, so yes. I totally know you you feel.
    I don't actually have many IRL friends, lol, so at least that is not a problem for me. My family leave me alone when I'm really deep in a book. THEY UNDERSTAND.

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    1. I feel that way sometimes too, it's so hard to not buy books, right? Your library do that?! That's awesome, but then, your library is awesome too, they have such good books for you to read! My Mum tends to leave me to read too, but I do the same for her when she is, we're nice like that :P

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  3. I feel your pain, honestly I do. I buy a lot more books than you but that's because they are super cheap on the Kindle. If I didn't then I couldn't because I just don't have the money to be spending on paper backs or hardbacks and its upsetting because I read a book and I end up loving it, wanting the physical copy but can't justify spending £6-£10 on it when I know I could have got it for like £1 on the kindle.

    No one who isn't a book lover understands how heartbreaking it is to NEED a book and not be able to get it. Glenn hates it when I talk about book's because he doesn't share the same passion as I do and it's one of the reason's I started my blog, I was sick of being ignored when I ranted or raved about something. I will say this for him though, he knows right away to suggest to people a book voucher of some description for christmas so I guess that makes up for the fact he doesn't listen to me moan or swoon.

    What I want you to do, if you can, is download the Kindle app to your phone if you don't already have it. Then I want to you to make up a public wishlist on Amazon just for Kindle books so I can once every few weeks have a look through it and get you one or two. I'm not even joking around here so do it as soon as you can ok? I can't promise I will get you expensive one's or lots all the time but I will get you at least 1 book a month, I'm not suggesting this because I want to be a martyr or anything, I'm suggesting it because I know how hard it is to want something without having the money, I also know what it's like to be happy about getting a really cheap ebook that I know you would like and not being able to tell you about them because I know you don't have a Kindle yet. So lets just cut out the middle man and do it on your phone for the time being yeah? make my life easier ;)

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    1. Exactly the reason I need a Kindle for sure! It's so good that he suggests them though, means he really does care and listen, so bless him for doing that for sure! I've already done the wishlist now, but just, don't go crazy, okay hunny? ;)

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  4. I don't actually have that many friends either...but the ones I do have know that books are my life, and while they don't understand that (they aren't readers), they do put up with me ranting and raving about books.
    I have a friend who I helped move recently...she paid me for my help in books. And while this particular friend does not read anywhere near as much as I do, she does understand the way I love books. It's similar to the way she loves food.
    And she does like reading, it's just less of a priority for her. And she comes to bookish events with me (because I hate going to things alone), and basically she's the bestest friend ever.

    My problems with storing books don't come from not having enough space, as such...it's more about my pedantic nature. Certain books belong in certain places on the shelves, and if there is no spot for them, well...then we have a problem. I can easily spend hours staring at my bookshelves trying to figure out where new books belong, and I often have to call my sister in for ideas (she helped me fit the Vampire Academy series into my shelves, because where I was planning on putting them wasn't going to work).
    And that's what's wonderful about my sister. She is literally the only person I know who understands the organisation of my bookshelves. Most people, when I'm complaining about the new books not having places, are just like "why can't you just put it there *points to where there's room*", to which I reply: "It can't go there! Are you crazy!?"
    People don't understand what's so crazy about placing a book just anywhere. The books on my shelves are very carefully organised, but not in any 'logical' way. Thankfully, my sister understands it, which is why I trust her to help me find spots for new books.

    And to answer your final question: No. You aren't being over-dramatic. While I don't have any 'reader' friends, I do have friends who are willing to put up with me fangirling or crying over books, and I honestly have no idea how I would cope if they didn't do that.

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    1. I think the friends that put up with it are good friends. My best friend suffers me a lot, so she's fantastic! I've never considered that some books have to go in places, mine are so shocking at the moment, need a real sort out after Christmas for sure! it's lovely to have someone who understands, it makes the whole hobby and love just that much sweeter right? :)

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  5. Ha!!! You're hilarious. <3 I'm totally a jealous reader too. I want ALL THE BOOKS!!! I just don't have anywhere to put them, since my one little bookshelf is full. :( That's why I love my Kindle and Netgalley & Edelweiss so much. And, of course, my obsessive love of audiobooks! <3

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    1. Aww thank you Lisa! I still want all the books all the time, how selfish of me! NetGalley is my saving grace sometimes, honestly, it's the most wonderful thing when you'e accepted for a book you thought you'd never get! I've not tried Audiobooks, they just seem so loooooong and I read quickly.. maybe one day! :)

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  6. I wanted to laugh and I wanted to cry at this post and I just want to GIVE YOU HUG! I may not suffer all the pains you do - I have a book club in real life with my friends (who, most of which, love to read) and I have bookshelves lining my bedroom walls and I buy every book possible - but I do understand how much I would life if I didn't have all those things. I'd probably rant and rave like you. And that's okay! And there was totally a point to this post - now I know what to give you for Christmas! (Because, just in case I didn't catch on before...)
    <3

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    1. Aww, it's so lovely to have people understand, I always think I'm alone on things like these, it's horrible, but it's good to not be! And it's always books, always, or money for books, it's the easiest thing to do! :D x

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  7. I think your love of books waaay surpasses mine! I thought I was hardcore!! XD I admire your dedication. In a way, it's great to have that one thing that you know is what you're all about. It seems you never doubt for a second that books are what you live for, which is kinda awesome. In a way I wish I cared MORE.

    I know what it's like to have to curb the spending on books! I'm still waiting for my book ban to end, which'll probably be when I get a internship or job. At the moment, I'm reading the books I went mad buying earlier this year, and taking trips back to my ol' library. :) The TBR situation gets MAD. Often its soooo SO frustrating to have to wait ages to read what was once a new release. I signed up to newsletters from orbit so I wanted to read The Girl With All The Gifts before it even came out. But I'd spent so much on books at the time. Now I've finally got it from the library and I'm probably the last person on earth to read this book! But oh well, at least I finally got to read it!

    As for the Where To Put Them problem... when I got a 97 fantasy book job lot of eBay, the first thing my mum said was "Where are you going to PUT them?" and I was like "Umm.... I probably should've thought of that before." At the moment, they're everywhere; under the bed, behind the door, on top of the wardrobe; if I had to sell some clothes to put them in a drawer, I probably would, I don't wear all of my clothes anyway. (Well, I try.)

    I'll be honest though, I've never cancelled on a friend to read a book! Sure, I'd sacrifice my sleep and deal with the repercussions of that later, but it's nice to have a change as well. It's tricky to give advice on this particular topic, but I'd say that even though it's hard, don't let yourself get upset over the ones you can't read! There's SOOO many books out there, I'm sure if you pick up another one off your TBR, you'll enjoy it so much you'll forget you were waiting for an ARC. =]

    Great post!

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    1. I think there's some people who's love surpasses mine too! The library is my biggest weakness, I'm ALWAYS there getting out books and not reading them.. *le sigh* I do agree though, it's nice to not read sometimes, and definitely see friends too, but on that one occasions, it had to be done, it was a finale, any other book could have waited! Selling clothes and losing sleep though, I'd do that in a heartbeat! :D

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    2. Woah-oh. Me too. I'm not even gonna tell you the library fines I got for doing that. e_e
      Oh it was a FINALE?! Why didn't you saaaay oh that's excusable. *waves hand* XD I don't think I ate slept or spoke when I got The Deathly Hallows at midnight. I don't think anybody did! The world must've come to a halt. I don't know how I got home. Oh well.

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  8. Yay! I'm back :) Finally catching up on visiting blogs, so of course I had to come here first ;) I like having a mass amount of posts to read, it's making up for the crappy weather and the fact my kitchen ceiling is leaking water.

    ANIMAL ARK! I'd forgotten all about those! <3 I loved those so much.

    I am lucky in a sense, I don't have any friends that read like I do but they get it. So they understand if I am having a severe book hangover or if I want to go in EVERY bookshop we go past. They can't get excited with me or fangirl with me, but they are understanding. Which is better than nothing.

    Stacking books on my shelf doesn't bother me because I've always needed to do that. It's only since I recently bought two new bookcases that I can finally have rows of books at the front. But even I know that won't last forever. Oh dear, so many books and so little space.

    Money! Oh how I loathe it. I had a lot of financial freedom this year and now it's all gone now. Now I know me and James need to afford this flat by ourselves, we have to budget. A lot. Money for books will be cut by so much next year. But... such is life. I can just join you in our joint misery of not having ALL THE BOOKS!

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    1. Oh no, a leaky kitchen?! That is definitely not good! Good to have you back though :D
      You had Animal Ark too? I loved those books, Cats in the Caravan, oh man, my favourite for sure! Understanding friends is always better than no friends though, I completely agree, and you're lucky to have those shelves, they're beautiful! Hey though, not buying books means you'll read all those books you've bought and not read, silver linings? ;)

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  9. If you find a way to make your room bigger, could you let me know? I have a serious case of too-little-room (not the problem of too-many-books like some people might say) I love to buy them and to receive them, but I have no where to put them and it's depressing that I have to make double stacks on my shelves now. I WANT TO SEEM THEM.

    I don't have a lot of money, I'm a poor student, so I know how you feel about wanting to buy a book you can't have. I needz it in my life. I'm now in a stage of my life where people no longer ask me what I want. They either 1. buy the books from the wishlist I gave them or 2. give me money to buy the books on my wishlist, haha. Sometimes 3. other things on my wishlist, because I like some other stuff too.

    I can accept it if someone isn't a reader, because we all need to do things we love. But what I can't accept are those things they say like 'it's just a book.' If you cut off your arm I'm not going to say 'it's just a wound' so SHUT UP :p

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    1. I agree, too-little-room is the issue, not too-many-books like they say, what liars! I get money for books a lot too, it's the easiest thing for them, and then hard for me because I have to choose, THAT PAIN. Oh, the whole dismissive thing about reading? That is so frustrating! It's definitely not JUST a book, it is magic that's what it is :D

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  10. "Have you ever kind of , cancelled your plans with somebody to read?"
    Craughing forever, because, yes. I get REALLY excited when plans fall through. That means I can READ!!

    I am out if space as well, and everyone bitches that I have way too many books. I am also tired of the entire "I don't have time to read" while they turn around and tell me about all of the TV shows they watch, then get very huffy when I don't watch any TV. Seriously, reading books is like social suicide in the adult world. At this point in my life, I just don't give a damn. I want to do what I want. If I want to read instead of watching House of Cards, then so be it.

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    1. Oh my days, it's so good to not be a lone on that Lyn! I thought it was just me, phew! :)
      I think the 'I don't have time' is a lie, you can always make time to do things you like, you MAKE it, right?
      I will tend to leave my reading until night so I get a fair share of TV and reading, but if I want to read, I read for sure!

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  11. Well, I'm an introvert so I don't actually have real friends, except for my hubby and then a couple of relatives that I'm really close with. And they all accept my bookish oddities lol :D When we go on our big, annual family vacation it always cracks everyone up when my father-in-law brings one book, my sister-in-law brings two, my mother-in-law brings a magazine and then I bring like 8 books haha :) And my husband just brings his laptop, so he can avoid us bookish types all together, and play online games :P

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    1. Aww, a few true friends and family is always better than loads though hunny, remember that! :)
      I think it's lovely that you're all readers, it's nice when that happens, you have a real support group there!

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  12. I have called in sick to work before just to read a book. I took Harry Potter vacation days when each new Harry Potter book was released. I would pick up my copy at midnight and read almost non-stop until it was finished. I've been what I called "book poor" before, with no money to buy books. I practically lived at the library and got depressed about the holds on the new releases. I feel your pain. Fortunately, my husband likes to read, though noth as much as I do, so he usually understands when I'd rather stay in and read than go to a movie or watch tv or go out somewhere. I get a little irritable though when he doesn't want to read and I'm forced to waste my time doing something else. I'm always looking for books I think he'll enjoy because as long as I've got him hooked on a book, or better yet, a series, I can count on getting some quality reading time. I have trouble being social with people who don't read too. How can you not like to read? I don't understand these people. Reading is so much more interesting than what you saw on Dancing With the Stars last night! Be gone, ignorant fools! Now see, you got me ranting too. It's not just you, not at all. :-)

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    1. I virtually live at the library too, I just can't stop going and getting the books out of there, even when I have so many myself already! Convincing your husband to read so you get peace? That is dedication for sure! Might have to try that when I find my Mr Almost-Perfect ;)

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